Efficiency in complexity is beautiful because nothing is wasted. No voice, no part of ourselves, hidden, covered, or quieted. If we hide our true voices, then they leak out sideways and our closest relationships suffer the loss first.
The way we perceive ourselves as separate, and removed from the enchanted world of doe and wolf is a sickness that you inherited of which you are only now coming to understand both the cause and the cure.
Perhaps this is a time to surrender to a deeper network of support, or to ceremonially part from a relationship that keeps us small, or a perspective of the world that creates more separation and dis-ease.