Why I Love Being a Single, Single Mom: Single & Alone Is Not The Same As Being Lonely

By Laura Phoenix Power

It’s not because I don’t believe in the beauty and power of love.

It’s not because I am bitter, frigid or otherwise unwelcoming.

It’s not because I lost all capacity to feel love, trust love or open my heart to another.

It’s not because I am afraid of another relationship not working out.

It’s not because I am unlovable, difficult, self-righteous, possessive or petty.

What I am is my own person.

I am empowered beyond generic societal perspectives or filters used to define what makes a woman whole or worthy.

I am balanced upon my self constructed fulcrum and don’t need to lean on “the one” for emotional stability.

I am standing tall in the forest of my own dreams which I weave into my daily existence.

I am worthy of all love imaginable and the freedom to experience that love on my own damn terms.

I am beautifully flawed and proudly wave my own freak flag that heralds my failures and victories.

I am my own wellspring of humor, health and happiness.

I am at home in my aloneness and do not need the company of others to validate my existence.

I am the one who creates my happiness and self fulfillment.

I am enough.

As a Mom, every choice I make models womanhood and imparts impressions to my kids. I want my daughters to live more, love more and reach for more than I’ve lived.

With all the love and fortitude within my heart, I work to set the standards high by loving myself fiercely, embracing my independence and living my dreams freely.

And every time I fail, fall or plunge into the sand traps of fear, they see me pick myself up and chart the steps ahead.

I am modelling the greatest love story of all to my daughters: self-love.

This alone fills my heart and nourishes my soul. It illuminates and clarifies the distinction between the convoluted paths of extrinsic pressures and the authentic paths of intrinsic truths.

I have fallen deeply in love with this moment as a single, single mom and the gifts of self-understanding it has brought. And I love the message being modelled for my daughters: that true happiness is to be, know and love yourself.

For more self-study, The Urban Howl recommends How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk.