By Michele Mekel HOLY FIRE

2017 Is All About Saying ‘No’ So You Can Say ‘Yes’

By Michele Mekel

It’s that time again.  Time to make resolutions.  Time to select a personalised word of the year that captures our intent for next 365 days.

Have you yours yet?

Well, mine is:  No.  Yep, two letters, one syllable.  N-O.  Just, no.

You might be thinking:  Seriously?  Why would you—how could you—pick “no”?!

Simple.  No is all about self-respect.  It’s about boundaries.  It’s about drawing your line in the sand.  It’s about what you’re unwilling to accept—and, more importantly, what you’re not.

I know, I know.  In light-work circles, no gets a bad rap.  It’s seen as negative.  It’s regarded as the low-vibration enemy of all that’s positive and uplifting.

But, really, no is about declaring your own worth.  No is about standing your ground.  No is about owning and exercising your personal power.

What Deserves a Big ‘Ole No?

So, what exactly am I saying no to—that you might want to ready your own no for, as well—in 2017?

  1. Sparkle-dulling Things, People, Activities, and Thoughts:  That’s right.  If someone or something—including any of my own thoughts—starts stunting my bubbly joy, stealing my natural soul shine, or eroding my hard-earned self-confidence, well, nope, it’s gotta go.  We work too hard and too long to build up those bounties, and they’re far too precious to squander on: people who don’t see and celebrate us for who we are, activities that deplete us or leave us flat, things that own us or detract from our peace of mind, and thoughts that undermine our happiness and wellbeing.
  2. Magic-masking Conduct:  2017 isn’t for playing small, so let’s not walk into it acting or feeling “less than” because that’s not what we’re made for.  Kowtowing to the muggles is so 2016.  In fact, there’s just no room for inauthenticity in the new year.  The coming year needs—no, demands—your one-of-a-kind magic.  All of it.  So, join me in letting it out instead of reigning it in.
  3. Natural-rhythm Silencing:  All that magic making requires rest and restoration, as well as plenty of giggles and a bit of glitter.  To maintain vibrant, powerful mage status, you must acknowledge and heed your own cycles of life.  When your body, mind, or spirit tells you that it’s time to shine, put on the high beams, boo.  When part of your being demands playtime, don your best dress-up costume, complete with gossamer fairy wings and a tinsel crown, and have a fantastical tea party—or whatever is your version of the best playdate ever.  But, when any of those beautiful bits that make you the wonder that you are says it needs downtime to rest or withdraw for a while, get quiet, listen closely, and follow your internal instruction manual.
  4. Inner-wisdom Distrust:  One of the most amazing things about being succulent sorceresses is that we come equipped with our very own wise-woman operating system.  Sometimes, though, we try to “shush” or subvert that font of intuition.  At those times, we either question or directly ignore what our gut instincts tell us.  And, if you’re like me, you may ultimately be grateful for the lessons learned as a result but sorry that you didn’t listen to what you “knew” at the time.  So, in the coming 365, I’m giving my interior sibyl full veto power over whatever triggers her grandma-spider senses because it’s time—well past time, actually—that I truly honor my own intuitive wisdom.  You, too?

Say No to Get to Yes.

That might sound like a lot of nos on the horizon.  And, maybe, it is.  But, in 2017, those nos are going to allow me to say “yes” to me and all of my glimmering, glorious mystery.  So, in the process of saying “yes, oh, hell yes” to yourself in the new year, what are you saying “no” to?

For more self-study, The Urban Howl recommends Choose Yourself!.

"I just don’t know if I’m cut from the same cloth as those who subscribe to the collective mentality of… The Wild Woman (gasp!). A free woman. A rebellious woman. A woman with nothing to prove. A woman who is not afraid to not only contemplate and reflect on the idea that exists around perhaps living from a place that is undeniably her truth, but who is actually living it. Maybe I don’t jive with some of the packaging this comes in. Maybe I am intimidated by it. Maybe I am jealous of those who don’t really give a f*ck what I think." —Jessica Durivage Kerridge of @whereismyguru #WAKINGWILD @kayharr73 @ladypantzz @tanyamarkul @thugunicorn Read more: Image: @whereismyguru

Image: @whereismyguru


  1. I learned decades ago in treatment for codependency that when you say no to something or someone else, it can actually be saying yes to self-love. <3

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