The dark time of the year has come. When the cold burns through every bone in your body, and your soul feels too tired to move, you know it is here.
This is the time of shadows. When all the wounds, and all the fears, and all your worries, rise to the surface. I feel it. I feel the isolation, the restlessness of my Wild Woman, who is incubating while trying to find her purpose again.
I feel lost. I feel that a huge change is needed. A magnificent shift in my soul work, yet its meaning is unclear at this time.
The darkness is creeping around me, threatening to swallow me whole if I don’t contain it. What do I do? How can I transform my feelings of depression and doubt, into creative action and purpose, when I barely have the energy to pick up this pen?!
How do I go on, when everyday life reminds me that I’m still not enough? I don’t have enough money to quit my job and do what I love. There isn’t enough time in my day to attend to my craft, when I have daily responsibilities to take care of first. When my gifts are not yet strong enough to truly help and heal others.
These are all the shadows that threaten to kill off our Wild Woman voice. And, while the truth may be you don’t have the financial stability to quit your job and focus solely on your purpose, that doesn’t mean we should do nothing. We cannot let the coldness freeze us in place.
We cannot be frozen, unable to move, think, or create, just because we are feeling our shadows.
The definition of the Wild Woman, to me, is a woman who can make the right moves, even when she is cold, afraid, and doubtful. She may not have all the answers, but she trusts in herself and the natural cycle of life.
We must let death happen now. We must let go of the things, people, thoughts, and actions that have prolonged their stay in our lives. I know this is easier said than done, my sisters.
The reason why it is hard for us to let go, is because we have the double-edged sword of hope. We have been taught that hope is a good emotion and motivator to live with. I’m here to tell you that hope is a destroyer of your true self and purpose.
Women use hope to do things that are not for their greatest good. We stay in abusive relationships because we hope one day they will change. We hope we will get the job we want, the house, the relationship…the list goes on and on.
Hope is a thought without action, which keeps the Wild Woman suppressed.
So what do we need instead of hope? Belief! Belief in ourselves, our worth, our value, and our capabilities. When we believe in our true self, we do not accept anything less than what we deserve today.
When we believe in who we are, we take action to achieve our goals and live our purpose. When we believe in the natural life/death/life cycle of the universe, we can do our shadow work and healing; knowing, not hoping, that our transformation is coming.
This is how we handle and grow through dark times. We believe, with absolute knowing, that new life is coming soon. The pain will lessen. The wounds will heal. We don’t hope for this, we make it happen because we are warriors, and our belief in ourselves is stronger than any negative barriers.
Believe in who you are, sisters. Believe in your value and worth. Believe you can take the first step to living your truth. Believe in your gifts and creative talent. Then, go out into this world and kick some ass!
For more self-study, The Urban Howl recommends The Inner Voice of Love: A Journey Through Anguish to Freedom.
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