By Krissy VanAlstyne HOLY FIRE

Come Back To The Truth & Magic Of Who You Are


Who am I when I’m no longer led by the wounds that are all I have ever known?

Who am I when I stop fucking running away and shutting down every time I feel unsafe?

Who am I when I stop letting that inner child act like a brat every time she doesn’t get exactly what she wants?

Who am I when I say I’m sorry, and am actually able to embody that truth into new behaviour, and not just carry the delivery of unintended, empty words?

Who am I when I can accept that what I did then is definitely not what I want to do now, and I am able to release the shame, and self-hatred for being there?

Who am I when the anger that I’ve worn as a safety blanket finally gets willingly pulled off?

Who am I when I’m able to stop the selfish act that I’m the only one who hurts, and become strong enough to see, and ease the pain in others, that perhaps even I created?

Who am I when I truly forgive the need and impossibility to be perfect or ahead of the game the way I used to need, in order to feel in control? The need from that time where my control was stolen from me, and that was the only stability I knew how to get.

Who am I when I no longer freeze when someone wants to intimately touch me or moves too quickly, because the sexual trauma from the past no longer has a grip on me?

Who am I when I can stop being so fucking terrified of real love and let someone inside the barricaded walls of what once was a brutalized heart?

Who am I when I no longer need someone to show me their heart before I can even begin to consider showing them the deeper parts of mine?

Who am I when…?

A magnificent question to ask one’s self that invites us deeper and deeper into all of what we really are. We can find who we were before our wounds and traumas masked our deepest truths that pulled us to explore our shadow self, the darkness, and the lies we knew better than to believe about ourselves. The lies that molded us in ways we thought we needed to be, to keep the hurt from coming.

May these words find their way into the crevices of your heart. May this invitation stir something awake, and invite you to your light. Come to the very magic that you are and were, before this world asked you to forget.

May we all be invited to remember.

For more self-study, The Urban Howl recommends 52 Ways to Live a Kick-Ass Life: BS-Free Wisdom to Ignite Your Inner Badass and Live the Life You Deserve.

Sip a little more:

I Am Broken — Only To Be Reintegrated Anew

I Am A Woman — F*cking Unruly, Surprising & Medicinal

"We're afraid that if we go all in that we might miss out on what this life has to offer. It's not true." . . . get both feet into your dreams . . . whole heart . . . whole self . . . whole life . . . jump ALL IN to the life you really want to be living . . . #youarethemagic #jump #bothfeet #wakeupanddream


Krissy VanAlstyne

Krissy VanAlstyne is a fiery force. One who shows up intimately transparent in her truth, inspiring others to do the same. She does so in her private life, through her writing, and in her heart's earthly work, as a Life Coach. Krissy offers soul-level support, and guidance to those aligning with their deepest truths, exploring their darkest shadows, and who are experiencing the painful dismantling that comes with awakening. She's a woman on a soul-driven mission, an invite back to all we have ever forgotten—that we are love, that we are truth, and that we are powerful beyond our wildest dreams. She knows we are all here for great purpose, and reminds us of this knowing in the mesmerizingly complex simplicity that she continues to stand in—the fire that is her. Find her on Facebook and Instagram.

  1. Krissy, I feel as thought I know you perfectly after reading this. I can relate to every point you made. Thank you for this beautiful message. I believe our paths are quite alike and I would love getting in contact with you.


    • Hello Brianna!

      Thank you for your words and sharing that piece of your heart with me.

      Please get in contact with me!

      Find me on fb/instagram – Krissy VanAlstyne or website –

      Hope to connect more soon!

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