By Krissy VanAlstyne HOLY FIRE

Grieve Dammit — It’s Inviting You Home


Grieve dear ones,
grieve fully.

And make your experience into the art,
that only you can.

Grieve the lies.

The betrayal.

The loss.

The confusion.

The clarity.

The shock.

The manipulation.

The control.

The parts of self we needed to be, and face.

Grieve the ego bits that pulled us away from love.

Because even in those moments,
you were love in another form.

We needed to go there.

Can we love that we went there?

It might not have been the gentle part of love,
but it was love, all the same.

Know that.

Grieve the shame.

The blame.

The avoidance of responsibility.

The lack of integrity.

The fear.

The attachments.

The expectations.

The weakness and impurities.

Grieve what was.

What will never be.

Grieve the endings.

The change.

The unanswered questions.

The silence.

Grieve every thought,
feeling, and emotion
that will wash over,
and through your system.


The parts that loved,
hard, and that opened to all,
that came your way.

Grieve the beliefs that you weren’t enough.

The beliefs that you were too much.

Grieve it all, dear ones.

Grieving is not a sign of weakness,
it’s a sign of the ability to feel,
and that your senses are
beautifully alive in you.

It is your strength.

It is your human beauty.

It is your right.

To feel.

It is the release.

The flight.

The transcendence.

The fire that will transform you.

If you let it.

Grieving is the return home that comes after walking the stretches of the journey that may have felt like it took you away from there — but it was only ever delivering you there, in new ways.

Grieve the home you temporarily shared, that two had built, with energetic pathways that brought you to the our.

Grieve the our.

The we.

Grieve the words and names you will no longer hear.

Grieve the new ones that you heard, that you knew were leading you to this place in time.

Grieve the subtle shifts, the signs, and all the parts that showed us, but that we weren’t ready to see just yet.

But now we can.

Grieve, dear ones, for this is the healing channel that will release the weights, the ties, and the energy that the entire experience was delivering you to.

So, grieve.

And don’t worry about the time it takes or the notion that love was lost somehow along the way, because it wasn’t.

For love, to the ones who do come home, for the brave who grieve fully,
and unapologetically, they know, it is only ever waiting to be found.

So grieve.

For love is lost most, in there, when we don’t.

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

For more self-study, The Urban Howl recommends The Confidence Gap: A Guide to Overcoming Fear and Self-Doubt.

Sip a little more:

Be With The Ones Who Energetically Pull Us In Fiercely And Hold Us There Safely

Stop Meddling & Let Everyone Experience Their Own Way Home

Dear Sensitive Creatures — We Need You At Your Most


The She Book

. . .


Krissy VanAlstyne

Krissy VanAlstyne is a fiery force. One who shows up intimately transparent in her truth, inspiring others to do the same. She does so in her private life, through her writing, and in her heart's earthly work, as a Life Coach. Krissy offers soul-level support, and guidance to those aligning with their deepest truths, exploring their darkest shadows, and who are experiencing the painful dismantling that comes with awakening. She's a woman on a soul-driven mission, an invite back to all we have ever forgotten—that we are love, that we are truth, and that we are powerful beyond our wildest dreams. She knows we are all here for great purpose, and reminds us of this knowing in the mesmerizingly complex simplicity that she continues to stand in—the fire that is her. Find her on Facebook and Instagram.

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