By Emily Dryzga HOLY FIRE

Find The When: When Did You Stop Practicing Your Magical Medicine?


There’s this meme floating around…

“In many shamanic societies, if you came to a shaman or medicine person complaining of being disheartened, dispirited, or depressed, they would ask one of four questions.

When did you stop dancing?

When did you stop singing?

When did you stop being enchanted by stories?

When did you stop finding comfort in the sweet territory of silence?”

Photo courtesy of Emily Dryzga

Photo courtesy of Emily Dryzga

Okay, great, we have found crucial healing paths for humans.

Dancing. Singing. Stories. Comforting silence.

Yes. Magical medicine. Passions. Ways to heal. Let’s also key in on the question. Focus on the wonder here. The answer isn’t the key.

WHEN. The question is when. When did you stop? When did you no longer practice the healing thing that helps you be more you? More human, more on fire, more full of passion and life and brilliant love? When did you stop?

Trace it back. Track it back. Root cause analysis. What sticky space crafted the crash? What happened in your timeline of when?

Was it a job that soured? A moment in time when you realized your career path wasn’t yours any longer? A fight with your partner when you knew you should’ve been exes long ago?

A disconnect in your daily life, like recognizing your regular routine was creating depression and anxiety? Maybe it was a specific traumatic incidence of argument or fray? Find your when, and you can find the way out.

I stop dancing when I have “too much work to do on the computer.”

I stop singing when I don’t make time to slow down and do bedtime gently with my sweet 1-year-old baby boy.

I stop being enchanted by stories when I no longer feed myself with good stories, and instead, feed myself social media scrolling and drama.

I stop finding comfort in silence when I’m so anxious and burned out that I cannot hold still for fear of panic attacks and overwhelm.

Yes, seek the dancing, singing, stories, and silence, and also seek the when. You’ve got this. I believe in you.

Photo by Adriana Aceves on Unsplash

For more self-study, The Urban Howl recommends The Inner Voice of Love: A Journey Through Anguish to Freedom.

Sip a little more:

Choose Nourishment That Supports The Fullness Of Your Magical Being

Rebellion Is Not Feeling Guilty For Being “Too Much Woman”

Create A New Pile Of Old Bones & Conjure New Life: Relationship Archeology

"No more second guessing. No more hiding out. No more running from my power. My truth. My holy. The witch has returned. Shook off years of sleep and forgetting.
Could no longer remain curled inside,
a silent observer of my perpetual tendency to self-destruct. Now she rises in a sea of flames. “Fuck this!” the mantra she chants to keep me honest. On my path. She is like a bore drilling through my soul, clearing away the plaque of a thousand lifetimes. Teaching me to no longer care what anyone thinks. Withdraw my investment in the bank of other people’s opinions." —Shannon Crossman #holyfire #fckoff #howlforyourlife #wakeupanddream Read more: @kayharr73 @ladypantzz @thugunicorn @dharmaunicorn @shann_crossman


Emily Otto


I'm a recovering corporate professional and former closet mystic. When you are completely stressed out, frustrated and craving purpose, you need someone who has been there and done then to walk you through it. I have been there and done that. It has been a long, twisty journey for me to figure out what I was craving, why I was stressed and in pain and what the fuck to do about it. My calling is to help illuminate your path and have you feeling sane, stable and connected. Find me at

  1. Pingback: Reclaim Your Howl, You Wonderful Brilliant Bold Witchy Woman – The Urban Howl

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